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Veteran
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Location: Republic of Cascadia http://zapatopi.net/cascadia/ | Aquarius - 8/17/2013 4:49 AM That does sound interesting! Tell me more, tell me more... With love - Aquarus
Well, Some have said that Plutonium is the most poisonous substance known to man.. 1 lb. of plutonium distributed evenly amongst The Human Species would kill every last one of them. Yet they handled alloys of it regularly with their bare hands at Los Alamos. Of course that depends on which Isotope. And there are trickier things to be considered, such as critical mass. Even solutions containing amounts of plutonium stirred improperly can have a "Criticality Event." This isn't Yer Regular garden variety Down Home nuclear explosion, but a burst of neutrons spraying like little subatomic bullets all ovah da place. Lookup The Demon Core in any search engine to find what happened to Harry Daghlian Jr. and Louis Slotin When Apollo 13 failed, they took great care to re-enter the tiny little nuclear reactor aboard the LEM to the Mariana Trench, the deepest spot in the ocean. Fukushima was the largest no0k complex in Da World. I have a plan. I am working through the steps. It will make the Moonshots small in comparison. For example, they didn't have ta Jack Da Munny first!  lol Next, I will need a very enlightened Team of "Different" Engineers. The existing crop fails miserably when it comes to Imagineering, amongst other desirable attributes. In the middle of this, I stumbled across Dark Energy/Matter Physics not as a Physicist, but by "getting my hands dirty" Metaphysically speaking. It is in reverse of the traditional Theory > Proof > Design > Results chain of things out of necessity and the Nature of the Beast; analyzing Cognitive Physics from the Point Of View of the Meat Computer, a recursive doppleganger at best. Heisenberg becomes your only Certainty by default. Now how do we tackle this to even begin to get to work? Time is on My Side here. Oh, those puns. lol In short, I plan to assemble a tube at the moon to take a half million cubic meters in one shot and submerge it under the earth's crust. Then after tweaking with test shots on the moon itself, I will turn my sights on "ET: Phoning Home!" It all boils down to two things 1. Have you EVAH seen an Engneerng Professor put a Paper Straw through a Raw Potato? Ask one! 2. The answer to your question is The Question, "Do You know the Ten Commandments?"
Well, I busted a few for sure... lol
Edited by alpha+omega 8/17/2013 10:08 AM
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UMS Guest
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Location: United Kingdom | Two men are sitting on a park bench one morning. Their conversation starts as follows:
A: What are you going to do today?
B: Nothing.
A: You did that yesterday.
B: I know, but I didn’t finish it.
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Grandparent’s Answering Machine Message:
Good morning. We are not at home, so please leave your message after you hear the beep. Beeeeep . . .
If you are one of our children, dial 1.
Then select one of the options from 1 to 5 in order of your birth date, so we know who is calling.
If you need us to stay with the children, press 2
If you want to borrow the car, press 3
If you want us to wash your clothes and do the ironing, press 4
If you want the grandchildren to sleep here tonight, press 5
If you want us to pick up the children up from school, press 6
If you want us to prepare a meal for Sunday or have one delivered to your home, press 7
If you want to come to eat here, press 8
If you need money, press 9
If you are going to invite us to dinner or take us to the theatre, start talking. We are listening.
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PhD Alumni
Posts: 4414
Location: United Kingdom | 'Don't take it all too seriously'
Well, kind of yes, this and we and us are all playing the Great Game of God
Which at the meta level, is certainly, a 'game', and something to seek to enjoy the playing thereof
But at the level of the here and now, matters become more complicated, a little, I feel.
In terms of this post on this thread, I might respectfully suggest: who are the 'Grandparents'?
They are the Gods and Goddesses
Who are the Gods and Goddesses?
They are our inner archetypes
What are our inner archetypes?
They are the templates by which we each of us live, inherited and/or introjected
What is the 'Answering Machine'?
It can only ever be, an Echo
And what is an Echo?
Our own voice repeated back; a character in Greek myth
Oh yes, sorry, back to the complication[s]:
Writing too in light and feeling of concern for war, the prevention of war, the burden on all leaders, and sending blessings and divine wisdom to those who bear the most heaviest of burdens at this current time:
Namaste to them, to the innocents, and also too, to those who are guilty, of crimes that they can only know
Edited by Paul Joseph 8/31/2013 3:27 PM
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UMS Guest
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Location: United Kingdom | Wise words, well spoken! Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. Could the following item by any change have come my way in reply to your questions, dear Paul? 
With love - Aquarius
Edited by Aquarius 9/4/2013 5:29 AM
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | What Is A Grandparent?
From papers written by a class of eight-year-olds.
Grandparents are a lady and a man who have no little children of their own. They like other people’s.
A grandfather is a man and a grandmother is a lady.
Grandparents don’t have to do anything except be there when we come to see them.
They are so old they shouldn’t play hard or run.
It is good when they drive us to the shops and give us money.
When they take us for walks, they slow down and show us things like pretty leaves and caterpillars.
They talk to us about the colours of the flowers and also why we shouldn’t step on ‘cracks.’
They don’t say: ‘Hurry up.’
Usually grandmothers are fat, but not too fat to tie your shoes.
They wear glasses and funny underwear.
They can take their teeth and gums out.
Grandparents don’t have to be smart.
They can answer questions like ‘Why isn’t God married?’ and ‘How come dogs chase cats?’
When they read to us, they don’t skip. They don’t mind if we ask for the same story over again.
Everybody should try to have a grandmother, especially if you don’t have television because they are the only grown-ups who enjoy spending time with us.
They know we should have a snack time before bed time. They say prayers with us and kiss us even when we’ve acted bad.
Grandpa is the smartest man on Earth. He teaches me good things, but I don’t get to see him enough to get as smart as him.
It’s funny when they bend over; you hear gas leaks and they say it was the dog.
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Edited by Aquarius 9/4/2013 5:28 AM
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Veteran
Posts: 205
Location: Republic of Cascadia http://zapatopi.net/cascadia/ | Now as I look in the mirror, that is funny. lol I am that Grampz, however a Grand Uncle only AFAIK (likely story.) But like Lulu , I seem to be getting younger. I better chill a bit or I'll have to crawl back in somewhere!
Edited by alpha+omega 9/4/2013 2:03 PM
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | ‘Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.’ Oscar Wilde
‘The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.’ Oscar Wilde
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Taking Advice
A young priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. Afterwards he asked his superior how he had done. The reply was: ‘When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to my water glass. Whenever I start to get nervous, I take a sip.’
Next Sunday the young man took the advice. ‘Who am I to argue,’ he told himself. As soon as he started his sermon, he felt so nervous that he took a good swig and was soon talking up a storm.
When he returned to his office after mass, the following note had been pinned to the door:
1) Sip the vodka, don’t gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spooky one.
8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the hell out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, he was not stoned off his ass.
10) We do not refer to the cross as the Big T.
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | The River
A minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great emphasis he said: ‘If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.’ Becoming really passionate, he added: ‘And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.’ Getting ever more carried away with his own fervour, he shook his fist in the air and shouted: ‘And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d take that and pour it into the river.’ When he had finished, he resumed his seat, highly pleased with himself,.
Very cautiously the song leader got to his feet. With a smile and hardly able to hold back his laughter, he announced: ‘For our closing song, let us sing Hymn 365 ‘Shall We Gather at the River?’
See you at the river, dear Friends. * * *
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Location: United Kingdom | White Eagle ‘The Spontaneous Joy Of The Spirit’ Stella Polaris Aug/Sept 2011: ‘Do not be too serious and solemn with yourself or else you chain yourself to the heaviness of the Earth’s atmosphere. Be very still and quiet, but also have the joy of the spirit singing within you and the laughter of the spirit on your faces. We, your spirit guides in the world of light, have a sense of humour and nothing gives them greater pleasure than to hear and see the joy of the spirit bubbling through you. We encourage happiness, the zest of life and a sense that whatever is happening in your world does so for good and wise reasons and therefore is right.’
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | More from ‘Graffiti Lives’ by Nigel Rees:
Back in a minute – Godot
(Dept. of English, Columbia University, N.Y.)
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Veteran
Posts: 205
Location: Republic of Cascadia http://zapatopi.net/cascadia/ | What happened? I thought the last post said "Interesting... Tell me more!" Then it wound up here! Musta been a digital wormhole... Well, Hyuna couldn't get arrested with her band 4Minute until she came in to do the video for Gangnam with Psy, an' Beiber's Producer picked 'em up and pumped their stuff. A couple BEEEEELION! hits later and the rest is history... As for all the other stuff, I am waiting on Hurricane Karen to go south. Maybe I should deke over to Arcata on my way to Vegas, although imagine it may snow by the time I am down there. I may not make it out of Vegas though because some crazy Native girls there think I am the Second Coming of Led Zeppelin... You Knoow, Oh, Oh. /HousesOfTheHoly I just gotta put Going To California in the setlist! I'm also workin' with Steph on this old Chestnut...
Edited by alpha+omega 10/5/2013 2:46 PM
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Another one from ‘Graffiti Lives’ by Nigel Rees:
Be alert.
Your country needs lerts.
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PhD Alumni
Posts: 4414
Location: United Kingdom | Love your posts too Alpha Omega ... and we share an appreciation of Zed Leppelin
Great archive video of the vastly underrated Lady Gaga
Yeah, we must be all disappearing down that digital wormhole. Not sure where we will wind up |
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Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | ‘The person who said: ‘Nothing is impossible!’ never tried to slam a revolving door.’ Anon.
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | ‘One trouble with growing older is that it gets progressively tougher to find a famous historical figure who didn’t amount to much when he was your age.’ Bill Vaughan
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | From ‘Graffiti Lives’ by Nigel Rees:
‘God is dead!’ Nietzsche
Someone scrawled underneath:
‘Nietzsche is dead!’ God
‘God is not dead, but alive and well,
And working on a much less ambitious project.’
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PhD Alumni
Posts: 4414
Location: United Kingdom | ‘God is dead!’ Nietzsche
'Me first', God |
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | 'Me first!' main motivation of unevolved Aries types. Thinking of themselves as God, which all of us really are, but it takes a long time for earthlings to understand the true meaning of this. With love - Aquarius
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PhD Alumni
Posts: 4414
Location: United Kingdom | Oh dear ... should I say 'ouch' ??!!
Although said in jest, my comment came more from the sense of self-sacrifice rather than Wall Street ... ie, if anyone is going to die, God is there willing to 'be first' to take the bullet ...
God empties her or himself in the process of manifestation (so might be thought of as dead; though I am not sure that is what Nietsche meant).
God is not dead s/he just needs us to do what s/he cannot readily do any more as a result of that process of manifestation. Miracles only ever rely on us; we are the angels...
Though occasionally if we are sufficiently 'whole', or 'holy', never say never
Not much Aries in my chart anyway as it happens, or so I thought.
Edited by Paul Joseph 12/6/2013 6:28 PM
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Veteran
Posts: 205
Location: Republic of Cascadia http://zapatopi.net/cascadia/ | Well, I signed the petition launched by David Suzuki. At least somebody is finally taking something seriously... http://www.avaaz.org/en/petition/We_demand_that_every_single_nations_leader_make_a_public_statement_and_clear_assessment_and_on_the_Fukushima_crisis/?cjKHBgb Likewise, this last interview with Carl Sagan also was prescient...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iyFw8UF85A#t=87 Other than that, I can crawl back under this rock here...
Edited by alpha+omega 12/16/2013 6:47 PM
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Eating In The UK In The 1950s
Pasta had yet to be invented.
Curry was a surname.
A takeaway was a mathematical problem.
A pizza was something to do with a leaning tower.
Bananas and oranges only appeared at Christmas.
All crisps were plain; the only choice we had was whether to put the salt on or not.
A Chinese chippy was a foreign carpenter.
Rice was a milk pudding and never part of our dinner.
A Big Mac was what we wore when it was raining.
Brown bread was something only poor people ate.
Oil was for lubricating, fat was for cooking
Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves that never were green.
Coffee was Camp and came in a bottle.
Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.
Only Heinz made beans.
Fish didn't have fingers in those days.
Eating raw fish was called poverty, not sushi.
None of us had heard of yoghurt.
Healthy food consisted of anything edible.
People who didn't peel potatoes were regarded as lazy.
Indian restaurants were only found in India .
Cooking outside was called camping.
Seaweed was not a recognised food.
Kebab was unknown as a word or as food.
Sugar enjoyed a good press in those days, and was considered to be white gold.
Prunes were medicinal.
Surprisingly muesli was readily available, it was called cattle feed.
Pineapples came in chunks in a tin. One only ever saw a picture of a real one.
Water came out of the tap. Had someone suggested bottling it and charging more for it than for petrol, we would have laughed.
The one thing that we never had on our table in the fifties was elbows!
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Where Is Paradise And Where Is Hell?
Paradise is where:
Chefs are Italians,
Mechanics – German,
Police – English,
Lovers – French,
And the organisers – Swiss.
Hell is where:
Chefs are English,
Mechanics – French,
Police – German,
Lovers – Swiss,
And the organisers – Italian.
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UMS Guest
Posts: 1938
Location: United Kingdom | Wives And Their Husbands
A number of women were attending a seminar for the healing of their relationship with their husbands. Their first lesson consisted of trying to salvage something from the wreckage of the romance that once existed between the partners. When the instructor asked: ‘How many of you love your husband?’ All the women raised their hands. The next question was: ‘When was the last time you told your husband that you love him?’ Some of the women answered today, a few yesterday and some couldn’t remember when they did.
Then the women were told to send a text to their husbands containing something like: ‘I love you, my dearest.’
Here are some replies:
- Who the hell is this?
- Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
- Yeh, and I love you too. What's up with you?
- What now? Did you crash the car again?
- I don't understand what you mean?
- What the hell did you do now?
- ?!?
- Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
- Am I dreaming?
- If you don't tell me who this message is for, someone will die.
- I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day.
- Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she?
Recommended Reading:
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Don't Take It All Too Seriously!
