We are magnetic beings and the law of attraction is at work in all life, including each one of us. This law sees to it that all human souls can only draw into their orbit that which they themselves are. Wherever we may find ourselves at any given time, that is always the right place for us to be. We are there to integrate certain lessons and the world around us can be used to help us find out what they may be. The environment is designed to act like a mirror of our unconscious inner self. At all times it is trying to help us become more whole by reflecting our inner world back to us.

That is why we can only see in others what we ourselves are. Alas, rather than living our less pleasant traits out, in a psychological process known as projection we prefer to assign them to others, rather than owning up to them ourselves. The world around us is always a reflection of the good as well as the distasteful behaviour patterns of others, which in truth are also our own. Nobody has any problems when it comes to integrating and owning the good qualities that are on display in this way. But having to deal with the less desirable and endearing ones is another matter entirely. Irrespective of how objectionable any of them are, in the process of becoming more whole it is essential that we own up to them. Even if our psyche tries to hide them from our conscious awareness,  they are there nonetheless. This is proved by the fact that we can recognise them in others whilst failing to see in them in us.

If our energies and characteristics were not so similar to the ones of those who irritate and annoy us – including our nearest and dearest – we would never have drawn a relationship with them into our lives, because we would not have needed it. But, the way things have been thus far in our evolutionary plan of life, we most certainly do. For as long as we suffer intensely from the nastier character traces we observe in others, we are receiving signals from the Universe that the same is tucked away inside us, in our own subconscious, waiting to be released.

Human behaviour is not compulsive and each soul can and indeed must in due course learn to choose how to behave in any given situation. This is where our much cherished freedom of choice comes into the picture, and that is the only true freedom the human soul has, while it is held captive by its physical body. The way someone behaves and the choices they make reveal better than anything else the evolutionary level that person’s soul has reached thus far. This gives a clear picture to our guides and masters on the higher levels of life of how much we have up to now learnt to control and master the lower aspects of our nature. Most of all this reveals itself in all our relationships with our environment, especially our human contacts and within that framework in particular with our nearest and dearest. That is why each one of these connections is of the greatest importance to every soul.

There is nothing to be afraid of here. We have not been given free will for nothing; we must exercise it and choose in any situation how we wish to behave. Nobody has to act upon any bad or downright evil impulses; there is always a choice. It is up to us to resist the pull of our lower nature and rise above its instincts and urges. The characteristics we observe as unpleasant in those around us will only continue to annoy and irritate us for as long as the same ones are lurking in our own subconscious. I can think of no better way than asking God and the Angels to help me lift them into my conscious awareness, so I can accept and acknowledge them. This I follow by a response of a firm: ‘No!’ and ask that they should be released and their energies transmuted into wholesome and good ones. That in a nutshell is evolution. It is a process that demands constant changes from us and our world; that is why nothing ever remains the same.

It is possible to influence others and those on the healer’s pathway ensure to do this in positive ways only. Anyone who to this day believes they can change someone else is chasing an illusion, because that is impossible. In all human relationships projection is always at work. It is a normal part of human behaviour. Everybody does it, so let this not worry you. Next time you find yourself in troublesome relationships and situations, stop feeling bad about them or yourself. Bearing in mind that the only person in the whole wide world that can be changed by us is ourselves, do something constructive and positive and get to work, not on the people who are irritating you, but on yourself.

Whenever we have problems with others and want their behaviour towards us to change, we must first sweep in front of our own door. To find a resolution we have to look within and with utmost honesty examine our own mannerisms and deep seated inner attitudes. They are the culprits and the cause of all our difficulties. First we have to assess our problem, then our search for a solution can begin. This is a journey like any other that starts with the question: ‘Where am I now, where do I want to go and how can I get there?’

From 'The Dynamics Of Human Relationships And The Law Of Attraction’

With love and light,
Aquarius
 

Dear Journi,

Please accept my most sincere apologies for misunderstanding the situation. As far as your birth details are concerned, if you do not know the time of birth of either one of you, please let me at least have the name of the places where you drew the first breaths of your present lifetime.

With love – Aquarius